发布于 由Deng, Yunyun

你想活出怎样的人生

   近两年由于陷入鸡娃的泥沼不能自拔，所以护肤、看电影还有这个公众号什么的都无暇顾及。说是“鸡娃”是抬举自己了，顶多就是努力跟上大部队的步伐~~~从来不以娃为中心的我，这几年将“以娃喜，以娃悲”发挥到及至，娃考好了，请吃饭；娃没考好，拉着人家絮絮叨叨的抒发半天心里的郁闷。搞得大家都以为我是有多重视学习，多功利的一个妈妈~~~

       其实学习成绩从来不是我的评价体系里最重要的一项指标。在分数最为重要的学生时期，别人是想着提高分数，我天天想的和做的是怎样全面发展，不让人觉得自己是个只会读书的书呆子。所以对于自己的娃，我教育的底线是至少不成为思想狭隘、自私和自我为中心的人。但是这些都需要具有一定的学习能力，才能扩展自己对世界上人和事的认识，从而不会成为我最担心的那类人。这是我一直想跟娃说但是又担心说不清楚的事情。正好最近娃看了我给她买的一本儿童哲学书，尽然天天开始担心自己会死，担心到平日倒床就睡的人睡不着觉，还问我“既然人都要死的，那活着还有什么意义呢？”这真是难为我这种钢铁理科生了。于是找了好多书看，而这本“你想活出怎样的人生”就是批着心里鸡汤类的外衣，但是讲的却是异常质朴，并且我十分认同的原则性的生而为人真正重要的东西。

关于学习：

“……无论是谁，个人经验总是有限的。人类拥有语言，因此可以将自己的经验分享给他人，也可以倾听了解他人的经验。而且人类发明了文字，可以通过书籍互相传递经验，并对比不同的人在不同场合的经验，从各方面汇总。这样尽可能多方面地汇总经验，以不冲突的方式整合在一起，就是做学问。可以说，各种学问都是将人类至今为止的经验汇总起来形成的。人们从前一个时代继承经验，在此基础上再积累新的经验，才能从与野兽无异的状态进化到今天。如果每个人都像猿猴一样重新再来一遍，就永远都会和猿猴一样，绝对无法达到今天的文明。因此我们要尽可能钻研学问，从人类积累至今的经验中获得知识，否则耗费再大的精力也没用。在此基础上，竭尽全力解决人类发展至今仍然无法解决的问题，在这样的条件下产生的发现，オ是人类真正的发现，才能被称为伟大。” 我想你已经明白了学习的必要性，不需要我再多说什么了。如果想获得伟大的发现，首要任务就是拼命学习，登上这个时代的学问顶峰，然后在顶峰上工作。但是，为了在顶峰上工作，为了登上顶峰。小哥白尼，你要牢记，不能丢失你半夜醒来后对疑问穷追不含的精神。

关于看待事物的方法：

“人习惯以自己为中心思考、判断事物；即使长大了，这种特性同样根深蒂固。等你长大了就会明白，在广大的世界上，能完全改掉以自己为中心思考的习惯的人，其实非常稀少。尤其碰到事关利害得失的时候，要跳脱自己的立场作出正确的判断，实在很难。面对利害得失如果还能抱持像哥白尼那样的想法，可说是非常了不起。大多数人往往陷入自私的想法，所以看不清真相，只看得到对自己有利的事。 如果人一直坚信地球是宇宙的中心，恐怕就无法了解宇宙真正的样貌；同样地，总是以自我为中心判断事物，也会让人不了解周遭事物的真相。这种人一定看不清重大的真理。平时我们当然会说是太阳升起、落下。有关这些日常的事物，按照习惯这么说并无大碍。不过，如果想了解宇宙的重大真理，就得舍弃那样得想法。世上其他事物其实也一样。”

关于对人的看法：

“重要的不是世俗的眼光或其他，而是你自己必须从灵魂深处了解人到底是什么地方了不起。然后，必须激发自己的向上心，打从心底想成为了不起的人。好事就是好事，坏事就是坏事，逐一判断好坏的时候，以及做你判断的好事的时候，都得贯彻从你胸中涌现的热切的情感。我并不是要模仿北见的口头禅，不过你必须有［不管谁怎么说］的决心。 如果你不这么做，即使我和你母亲期望你成为了不起的人，即使你自己也想成为了不起的人，恐怕你只能成为［看起来了不起的人］，不能成为真正［了不起的人］。世界上有许多人喜欢表现得让别人觉得他们很了不起，这些人最在意别人怎么看自己，总是忽略了真正的自己、原来的自己是什么样的人。我不希望你成为这样的人。 所以，小哥白尼，我再重复一次，你必须珍惜自己的感受和深深感动的事。不要忘记这些事，而且要认真思考这些事的意义。”

关于贫穷：

“小哥白尼，随着你长大成人，你会渐渐知道：贫穷的人在生活中基本上都很自卑。褴楼的衣衫、脏乱的家，还有每天简单的食物，都很容易就让他们无地自容。当然，也有生来贫穷但依然很自信的高尚入士，但在这世上，很多人都会在有钱人面前完全抬不起头来，好像自己低人一等，只会胡乱点头哈腰。这种人自然得不到别人的尊重，倒不是因为他们没钱，而是因为他们卑怯的性格，受人蔑视也没办法。但是，小哥白尼，就算是自導心很强的人，一旦陷入贫穷，也会因某些事而感到自卑，这是人之常情。所以，我们不要忘记时时谨言慎行，以免让他们感到自卑。对于人来说，再没有什么比自尊心受伤更糟糕的体验了。贫穷的人常会有那样糟糕的体验，因此千万不能在无意中伤害他们容易受伤的自尊心。   从道理上说，就算贫穷，也不应该因此而自卑。人真正的价值并不存在于穿着、住宅和食物中。无论穿着多么名贵的衣服、住着多么奢华的宅邸，笨蛋就是笨蛋，小人就是小人，作为人的价值不会因此而提高。若是心灵高洁、博学多闻的人，即使贫穷、也是值得尊敬的、了不起的人。因此，若人为自己拥有的价值抱有真正的自信，那么无论境遇如何，都可以生得心如止水。作为人，在贫穷的境中不该看低自己，在富移的生活中也不要自以为是。自始至终，我们都必须着眼于自己作为人的价值。如果还因贫穷而自卑，就证明作为人还远未合格。”

……好吧，希望于辰辰共勉之~~~

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